Podcast Episodes 23 Nov 2010 11:17 pm by David !


“EXHAUSTION FROM HAVING SEX WITH A MINOR,” by Yahtzee Croshaw. Read by the author.

“The job of Prime Minister is no job for a weakling,” said Derek Fortham MP, eyes shining in the TV spotlight. “Centuries of British politics have shown us that. It’s a job that calls upon all of a man’s strength. It’s a job for men who know their limitations. Men with perspective. With drive.”

The audience was utterly silent, staring with goggle-eyed hero-worship as Fortham reached into his inside pocket and produced a white slip of paper, which he held between his first and second fingers and waved in time with his speech.

“I always keep my death prediction close to my heart. At the age of fifty-seven I will be knocked down by a car; that’s what it says. I don’t fear it. I’ll never run from it. When I see that car coming, I will stand with feet firm. That’s the kind of strong leadership this country needs.”

Download the MP3 Subscribe on iTunes
Direct podcast feed: http://feeds.feedburner.com/machineofpodcast

Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw was born and raised in England but now lives in Australia. Primarily a gaming writer, he is responsible for the “Zero Punctuation” video reviews at The Escapist online magazine. His first novel, Mogworld, has been published by Dark Horse Books. His personal site is fullyramblomatic.com.

In the book, Yahtzee’s story is illustrated by Cameron Stewart!


  1. on 24 Nov 2010 at 2:06 am 1.Glen said …

    The iTunes MP3 is the wrong one. You have re-published “Fudge” by Kit Yona instead of Yahtzees story. you’ll want to fix that asap.

  2. on 24 Nov 2010 at 2:32 am 2.AukonDK said …

    The Feedburner RSS also downloads Fudge in GPodder, the “Play now” link is wrong while the title link is right.

  3. on 24 Nov 2010 at 10:58 am 3.admin said …

    Thanks for the head’s up — it’s been fixed now! iTunes will update in a few minutes. Sorry for the error.

  4. on 24 Nov 2010 at 12:56 pm 4.Justin said …

    OMG I didn’t see that ending coming at all. Spooky.

  5. on 01 Dec 2010 at 2:47 pm 5.Timmy H said …

    Wow, that was pretty astounding, well done Yahtzee, I am very much impressed with that ending! The start and bits inbetween were pretty decent too.

  6. on 01 Dec 2010 at 9:09 pm 6.jesusfuck said …

    That was actually pretty hilarious. Nice job.

  7. on 02 Dec 2010 at 12:32 pm 7.Laozi said …

    I liked the story, but I think it was a very bad decision to choose the punchline as the title of the story. This completely spoiled the ending for me. There is a good reason why certain movies aren’t called “The Man Who Didn’t Know He Was Dead” or “Luke’s Father Strikes Back”.